As much as we try to direct the conversation to non-baby topics, it always manages to get back to Natalie and Sophia. I think this would happen in the States as well, but I probably wouldn’t receive as much unsolicited advice back in Minnesota. I don’t mind receiving advice, and I often ask for it, especially concerning topics like cloth diapering, low milk supply, solid foods, etc. There are two big areas that locals always wonder about.
The question: Why aren’t Natalie & Sophia dressed more warmly?
The answer: Because they aren’t cold.
If Natalie & Sophia are wearing a short-sleeved onesie under a footed sleeper, a Turkish baby is wearing a short-sleeved onesie, asleeper, socks, leggings, a sweater, and a sweater-vest. My Turkish friends look at me like I am doing my children harm. It is 72F+ in most homes, and if it isn’t, my friends turn on a space heater (and warm up Natalie’s and Sophia’s feet) or I am forced to put a hat on them. I try to tell my friends that there is a lot of snow on the ground where I’m from. I choose the coldest place in Turkey and say that is like my home state. But locals are convinced that being cold translates to getting sick, so from their perspective, they are only looking out for Natalie’s and Sophia’s well-being.
The question: Why are you not feeding your babies soup yet?
The answer: Because that’s not usually the food that we start with in America. We typically feed our babies just one food at a time.
The first food in Turkey is usually vegetable soup – potato, carrot, onion, and a little bit of butter or olive oil. When I say that Natalie & Sophia are starting with banana and avocado, I get very strange looks. I think they think that I just peel the banana and feed it to them without mashing it up. (As a sidenote, sometimes friends think that I am ignorant completely based on the fact that I speak their language roughly (and slowly). I want to say, “Just because I can’t tell you why I do something doesn’t mean I don’t have a reason.”)
However, the reason we only feed one food at a time is to become aware of allergies more quickly if they occur. I don’t know of many Turkish kids who have any allergies. And when I tried to see if the 4-day wait rule is still recommended by pediatricians, I found this blog post. Maybe I should have started with vegetable soup??
Two more interesting tidbits about feeding children. Children don’t really learn to feed themselves. It’s just faster and easier for the parents to do it, and so you see parents chasing 4-year-olds around with a spoon trying to get them to eat just one more bite.
Also, at our six-month appointment, the doctor was telling us that we should introduce non-pureed foods early on. “Yes, I know that’s important for development,” was my response.
“Because it’s a problem here. There are some kids who only eat pureed foods as they get older,” he replied. I didn’t believe him.
Then one day, I was at my neighbor’s home and she was talking about a friend with twins whose job, she believed, was easier than hers, because “her kids eat normal food”.
“What does Mehmet eat?” I asked about her 1 1/2 –year old.
“He only eats pureed foods.”
“Still?” I asked.
“I think he’ll probably grow out of it when he is about 2 or 3.”
What?!?
And this is apparently common. I was introduced to another mother of twins last week while on a walk with Natalie & Sophia. Her one piece of advice for me. “Don’t puree all of their foods; just mash it with a fork. It was my mistake and now my daughters won’t eat anything.”
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